... she must be sought, she won't approach ... and it's a quest to find her ...
The HP is not trying to hide, she is just hidden. Very helpful, once you've found her, behave properly (whatever THAT means ) and ask the right questions.
From what I know the HP is also a symbol of sexuality, of physical love. To experience this with her, one needs to show devotion, total dedication to the act. Love.
That involves the readiness to die in her arms.
(An orgasm has often been seen as a kind of death, and it is indeed the death of the phallus [before its rebirth ]. The Kings of certain old legend, married to the Highpriestess [representative of the Goddess] show that devotion; they knew at the end of their reign they we're going to be sacrificed. Those sacrifices were probably seen as the final orgasm, and the King was believed to enter the Goddess realm after his death, to be reborn.)
This 'vagina dentata' may be an aspect of the reversed HP. I can well believe that many men (or people) who see sex as a way to dominate/overpower/satisfy only themselves are mortally scared of the devotion the HP demands.
And that kind of horror leads to projections like 'vagina dentata'.